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EVERYTHING'S ALRIGHT
When my life feels like it is spiraling out of control (as I've felt the past few days) I try to focus on something, anything that will calm my nerves, whether it is a mantra, a prayer, a song, a quote. I've been known to recite Invictus when feeling low.
But the one song that really makes things feel better is "Everything's Alright." That's the song that Mary Magdelene sings to Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar. I prefer the Yvonne Elliman version.
So that's my little secret. It's been a rough 48 hours. I probably should have gone to work today instead of staying home to work on Lazarus stuff -- which I didn't even get all done.
Life is hard right now. A lot of people around me don't fully understand that THIS...all this...is my life. It's my career, my passion, my dream. Yesterday, one of my friends accused me of treating him more like a customer than a friend.
That really fucking broke my heart. Yeah, we talked about it, and it's squashed, but how can you forget something like that?
People want me to vent to them, but I can't. Venting is stressful, and I don't always feel like rehashing every failure of the day to all of my friends. I don't want them to assume EVERYTHING is okay but I also don't want to burden them. I just want to be a friend to them and keep things as normal as they once were.
But that's a crock, because things will never be normal, will they?
I told one of my friends today that I don't feel like many of my friends are intuitive enough. Which, in a nutshell, means that I probably expect too much. On one hand, I don't want to burden people with my problems, but on the other, I want to be asked if I have any problems.
Kinda makes sense, kinda doesn't.
People are in my corner, I know that. But people are people, and I've got to do a better job communicating with people. I am internalizing things I shouldn't be.
It's all so complicated, but so simple.....
MARY MAGDALENE
Try not to get worried, try not to turn on to
Problems that upset you, oh.
Don't you know
Everything's alright, yes, everything's fine.
And we want you to sleep well tonight.
Let the world turn without you tonight.
If we try, we'll get by, so forget all about us tonight
APOSTLES' WIVES
Everything's alright, yes, everything's alright, yes.
MARY MAGDALENE
Sleep and I shall soothe you, calm you, and anoint you.
Myrrh for your hot forehead, oh.
Then you'll feel
Everything's alright, yes, everything's fine.
And it's cool, and the ointment's sweet
For the fire in your head and feet.
Close your eyes, close your eyes
And relax, think of nothing tonight.
APOSTLES' WIVES
Everything's alright, yes, everything's alright, yes.
JUDAS
Woman your fine ointment, brand new and expensive
Should have been saved for the poor.
Why has it been wasted? We could have raised maybe
Three hundred silver pieces or more.
People who are hungry, people who are starving
They matter more than your feet and hair!
MARY MAGDALENE
Try not to get worried, try not to turn on to
Problems that upset you, oh.
Don't you know
APOSTLES' WIVES and MARY
Everything's alright, yes, everything's alright, yes.
JESUS
Surely you're not saying we have the resources
To save the poor from their lot?
There will be poor always, pathetically struggling.
Look at the good things you've got.
Think while you still have me!
Move while you still see me!
You'll be lost, and you'll be sorry when I'm gone.
MARY MAGDALENE
Sleep and I shall soothe you, calm you and anoint you.
Myrrh for your hot forehead/
Then you'll feel
Everything's alright, yes, everything's fine.
And it's cool and the ointment's sweet
For the fire in your head and feet.
Close your eyes, close your eyes, and relax
Think of nothing tonight.
APOSTLES' WIVES
Everything's alright, yes, everything's alright, yes.
MARY MAGDALENE
Close your eyes, close your eyes, and relax
Posted by Rashid on April 18, 2005 8:30 PM